"You Gotta Be Kidding!"
by Mickey Charles CEO, sportsnetwork.com
HUNTINGDON VALLEY, Pa. (Sports Network) --
The one-eyed man is king. Which is not to say that Donovan McNabb is not a
hell of a quarterback but, after all, these are the Eagles and their 2000
schedule listed Dallas, a shell and ghost of America's team, New Orleans
before they found their winning ways, Atlanta, Washington...the team with the
owner who shot himself in the foot and other vital parts (wallet, for
example), Chicago, Cleveland and Cincinnati. Philadelphia lost to the Giants
twice, got tweaked by Green Bay, beat Pittsburgh...a team with more ups and
downs than an Otis elevator and got the short end of a game that Tennessee did
not take seriously. The only schedule easier than this one was the sort that
John Thompson used to devise for his Georgetown Hoyas to build their pre-real
season confidence, his own ego and national ratings. Next year will not be
quite the same for the "Iggles."
Donovan McNabb leads a rag-tag Eagles'
offense that lacks potent receivers and running backs. (Lyons/Allsport)
The NFL wanted parity and they got mediocrity. Yet, they are satisfied.
Incredible. The indifference of the powers that be, owners and league office
alike, is equaled only by their acceptability of inferiority and recognition
If any department in our organization performed with the intensity of either
the Seattle Seahawks or San Diego Charges we would sack the lot of them.
Instead, in the NFL, the blind are leading the blind with the ineffective and
incompetent seeking greater rewards for their farcical lack of production.
How about some of the quarterbacks that cannot lead their team out of the
locker room without running into a wall? Chris Chandler of Atlanta should be
checking the classifieds for openings as a short order cook. Danny Kanell can
do the pots and pans with more dexterity than he handles the ball. The Windy
City has now added Cade McNown of the Bears to its sacrificial offerings on
the altars of Soldiers Field and his heart was taken out long ago. With less
talent than some Pop Warner field generals, McNown performs more like a
private...and not first class at that. The Motor City's Charlie Batch might
be the most over-rated gift from Detroit since Motown gave us rap and dared to
call it music. With more injuries than the cast of "Saving Private Ryan," we
are then awarded Stoney Case, a mental midget with a football personality to
match. Instructed to hold the ball and not give it away under any
circumstances in the final few minutes of a game that was his team's gateway
to the playoffs, he throws an interception for a touchdown the wrong way and
then his fumble leads to the winning field goal. Duh!!!!
Chris Chandler of Atlanta should be
checking the classifieds for openings as a short order cook.
Jake Plummer has to be let out to pasture with the rest of the studs that are
beyond their years and only good for increasing the population. If not,
Arizona will be mired fighting the Redskins for some semblance of
respectability since Dave Brown was seen applying to fast-food icon KFC, where
he belongs. Kerry Collins of the Giants actually thinks he can play because
his team is in the playoffs with a decided advantage over all comers, an edge
he will dissipate with aplomb. Count on it. I don't know what he did at Penn
State but his stewardship of the New Yorkers is seriously in question and I
say this as a Giants' fan. Brad Johnson and Jeff George in Washington do not
add up to one whole person. With a name like Ryan Leaf he would definitely be
better off just moving to the branch of the nearest tree rather than setting
up over the center for the San Diego Chargers. Bad takes on a new definition
watching him perform.
Those with weak stomachs cannot endure Jon Kitna of Seattle for more than the
opening four downs. To do so puts 911 on instant alert. Doug Pederson has
Cleveland, with Tim Couch out of action, and they deserve one another.
Kordell Stewart makes as many mistakes as he does good plays, and Rob Johnson
should do the decent thing and let Doug Flutie step in as starting quarterback
in Buffalo for next season. Then there is Vinny Testaverde, whose contract
obviously has a clause or two in it stating that he is to make as many
mistakes as he does good plays and never...absolutely never...run through an
open field for 10-20 yards when he can throw an interception or out of bounds.
No matter what the Jets do to win key games he will find a way to blow them.
The games that is.
There are four games this weekend and, in three of them, the home team is the
underdog. The Eagles host Tampa Bay as a 3-point dog, Miami is getting one
against Indianapolis and New Orleans is supposed to be a touchdown less
efficient than St. Louis. Only Baltimore is given a legitimate edge over
In the City of Brotherly Hate - something you will understand watching the
worst fans in all of sports this weekend, the Eagles believe that they are an
11-5 team that has beaten the best that the NFL has to offer. They are
talking and thinking Super Bowl. They have lost their respective minds. They
are a one-man team. Anyone that doubts this has not watched football since
they wore leather helmets and played both offense and defense with the same
players. The worst playing surface in the NFL will worsen and deteriorate
into a literal mine field following the first scheduled blizzard of the year
despite borrowing tarps and snow blowers from Pittsburgh and the Meadowlands.
Tampa Bay's personal albatross of not having won in 19 tries when the mercury
was below 40 degrees would have come to an end at 18 if not for an unusual
errant field goal attempt by someone not known for missing from short
distances. The weather up in Green Bay had to feel more like 40 below and the
Bucs played admirably.
Philadelphia will have to ice down the opposing side of the field to stop
their visitors from the south. Can they? Maybe. Likely? Not from this
vantage point. Tony Dungy will be more conservative than George Bush's new
cabinet members and he wants that final "home game" for Super Bowl XXXV. They
can run much better than Philadelphia and stop what little run the Eagles
muster. But, the boys in Philly genuinely believe that they are an 11-5 team
and discount their schedule. Maybe they should start looking at 2001 and come
down to earth. It is the reward for winning...their usual NFC East opponent
who will only get stronger (Washington, New York) and St. Louis, Minnesota,
Oakland, Tampa Bay (down there), Detroit under the dome, Kansas City on the
road. San Diego and Seattle might be a couple of gifts, but 11-5 next year is
not in the cards.
Having said that, St Louis to beat New Orleans again (but I will be rooting
for the Saints), Tampa Bay over the Eagles, Miami in a squeaker - but I like
Indianapolis at first blush and Denver to upset Baltimore. Are those choices
worth taking to the bank? You gotta be kidding me! It's finally time to say
it..."On any given Sunday..." Thanks NFL...for not very much.